Challenging Unhelpful Thoughts
Summary: What do I need to know?
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Unhelpful thoughts can make your pain worse, worsen your mood, and lead to more negative thoughts.
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Some of these thoughts, while true, don't make you feel better in the moment.
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Recognizing your unhelpful thoughts, and then refocusing or reorganizing them, can bring your spirits up and break up that tornado of negative thinking.
Negative thoughts can have a big impact on your pain. Having negative thoughts is really normal and common! It’s just how the brain works. The goal isn’t to get rid of all your negative thoughts; that would be impossible. You can, however, modify some of these negative thoughts so they aren’t taking up all of your energy. There is a lot in the experience of cancer that is difficult to control. Thoughts are something you can modify and it can help you feel better! Thought modification is important because…
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Negative thoughts can have physical effects, such as pain.
Negative thoughts affect your mental quality of life.
Everyone has negative thoughts, especially when they have cancer and they’re in a lot of pain. Yet, sometimes even though these thoughts may be true, they don’t help you feel good in the moment. Just because a thought is true, doesn’t mean that you always want to be thinking it. At the same time, thoughts can be partly true or entirely false all together.
It’s helpful to try to move away from thoughts that make you feel worse and to focus on things that help you stay present and engaged.
Some say having a lot of negative thoughts or getting lost in your negative thoughts (which can happen really easily when you have cancer pain and are worried about it) feels like getting stuck in a tornado.
Negative thoughts can build on each other and trigger a lot of fear and stress on the body, which directly make your pain worse.
Getting lost in the tornado of negative thoughts can sometimes feel unavoidable, but you can work to try and get out of it, or stop it before it gets too bad.
It’s common to think of the worst when you’re in pain. For example, if you’re having a really bad day, you might be thinking “nothing helps me feel better.”
Beginning steps towards changing negative thoughts
Recognizing when you’re thinking negatively can help you slow the tornado down and refocus on thoughts that can help you.
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Focus on identifying your negative thoughts:
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Which thoughts do I notice coming up a lot?
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When do these thoughts come up?
Think about the relationships between these thoughts and your wellbeing:
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How does this thought make me feel?
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Does this thought impact my pain? Right now? In the long run?
Start to question these thoughts:
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This may be true in the moment, but is it always entirely true?
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Will focusing on this help me feel better or worse?
Start to evaluate if the thought is helpful or not.
Some examples of thoughts that aren’t helpful are…
“I used to be able to do so much more.”
“My cancer must be getting worse.”
"No one understands me, I'm alone in my pain."
“Nothing is helping me right now.”
If a thought isn’t helpful, there are some things you can do in order to change it.
Refocusing and redirecting your thoughts when you’re overwhelmed can help you move out of the stressful tornado.
These are some tips that can be helpful:
Find some healthy distractions like watching tv, listening to music, or calling a friend
Imagine a less extreme or stressful version of the thought.
Try to make peace with things you know you can’t control
Focus your energy on what you can control
Commiserate with someone going through something similar
By recognizing your negative thoughts and working towards making your thoughts more helpful you can sleep better, feel better, have less pain, and find enjoyment in a daily activity. There is a lot of really good science showing that this tool can help your pain and help you live a better life! It’s hard at first but it’s easier with practice. We’ll also try some quick tips to help you learn how to do it.
